


When We Need Each Other

by OnceAndAlwaysEnglishMajor



Category: Mystic Messenger (Video Game)
Genre: Depression, F/M, Family Dynamics, Gen, PTSD, dealing with depression, learning to cope, lots of emotion, rescue dog
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-02
Updated: 2017-05-02
Packaged: 2018-10-26 19:29:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,771
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10793256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OnceAndAlwaysEnglishMajor/pseuds/OnceAndAlwaysEnglishMajor
Summary: Saeran gets a rescue dog and copes with his depression and ptsd.





	When We Need Each Other

Saeyoung was always over the top. Saeran understood on some level that his brother overcompensated, that Saeyoung had to be that exuberant, or he’d fall into the same darkness that still so often consumed Saeran. It was easier with MC. She was quieter, calmer with him. They had history, of course, but it wasn’t the same as with Saeyoung. But he was trying, with his brother, and he acknowledged that Saeyoung was trying too. It was fragile, this life they were building. But MC refused to let either of them quit.

            “Saeran,” MC called, “Saeran, wake up. I’m going to touch your shoulder now, ok?” Her hand was feather light on his shoulder, gently rubbing to wake him up. Saeran groaned groggily and sat up. Apparently he’d fallen asleep on the couch again. MC backed off as soon as he sat up, and Saeran marveled again at her patience. Shortly after Saeran moved in, MC had explained to him (and Saeyoung, _again_ ) that she was a ‘physical touch’ person, that’s how she showed people she cared about them, and it made her feel cared for. But she wouldn’t push either of them and she never wanted to make them uncomfortable. (She had to explain this to both of them, multiple times.) Slowly, MC was teaching the brothers about positive physical interactions. So Saeran was amazed by her patience. Especially with him. She loved Saeyoung, so academically, he could understand her patience with his crazy brother. But with him? He still didn’t quite get it, no matter how many time she said, “You’re my brother, too, Saeran.”

            She watched him now, carefully outside his bubble as he woke up. He focused on her and MC’s face lit up.

            “We’re going on an adventure, Saeran!” she told him excitedly.

            “An adventure?” he repeated. “We just went to the grocery store…two days ago?” Everything that involved leaving the house was an adventure to MC, and their most common ‘adventure’ was MC taking him with her when she went shopping. He carried the bags and MC always bought him something sweet for the week.

            “Not the grocery store!” MC chirped. “It’s a surprise!”

            “Walking or driving?” he asked, wandering over to the door to put on his shoes.

            “Driving,” MC said. Saeran frowned. They were driving, but they couldn’t be going somewhere populated, or MC would warn him. It couldn’t be a picnic, because Saeyoung wasn’t coming. It bothered him a little that he had no idea what MC was planning. But, after almost a year of living with Saeyoung and MC, he trusted MC.

            MC practically buzzed with excitement while she drove. Saeran watched the city pass outside his window. They didn’t talk, but that was ok. MC pulled up to a non-descript cement building and Saeran studied the sign.

            “An animal shelter?” he asked. MC nodded enthusiastically.

            “We’re going to love on the puppies and kittens!” she told him excitedly.

            “Well, that explains why Saeyoung didn’t come,” Saeran commented drily. MC groaned.

            “Can you imagine? I’d need a leash for him! I suppose I could get one of those kiddie leashes with the backpack…” Saeran smiled, just a little, at the idea of MC putting his hyperactive brother on a kiddie leash.

            A polite lady with brown hair in a neat ponytail greeted them, introducing herself as Jane and explaining the process. Saeran walked down the rows of kennels, holding out his hand for eager noses to sniff. But the one that caught his attention didn’t come to sniff his hand. The off-white dog watched him from the back of the kennel, attentive blue eyes visible over the fluffy tail tucked over his nose.

            “Can I sit with this one?” Saeran asked. MC beamed at his initiative.

            “You can try,” Jane said slowly. “We haven’t had much luck socializing him yet. He comes from kind of a rough background.” Saeran just nodded, never taking his eyes off the dog doing it’s best to be as small as possible.

            Saeran waited in a small room with benches all the way around and dog toys scattered across the floor. MC decided to play with the cats. A shelter worker brought the sad white dog to meet Saeran. He sat on the floor, knees pulled to his chest, trying to look as non-threatening as possible. The dog sniffed around the room, but didn’t approach. Saeran stayed still, waiting. The dog curled up about three feet away from Saeran. “It’s ok, buddy,” Saeran whispered. “I have kind of a rough background too.” Carefully, carefully, Saeran moved closer, moving an inch then stopping, waiting to see how the dog would react. Fifteen minutes of this careful creeping found him sitting right next to the wary dog. He had to be some sort of shepherd or husky mix, Saeran decided. Unexpectedly, the dog shifted just enough to press his nose to Saeran’s thigh. Saeran could feel his hot breath through his black skinny jeans. Slowly, slowly, Saeran moved his hand until it rested on the dog’s neck. The dog huffed, but didn’t move, and Saeran smiled. He didn’t move and neither did the dog. Saeran wasn’t sure how long they sat like that before the soft click of the latch made them both look up. Jane stood in the doorway, MC peering over her shoulder. MC’s phone was out, and the guilty look on her face said she’d been taking pictures of him again. Saeran rolled his eyes, knowing those pictures will be all over the RFA messenger later. MC took almost as many pictures as ZEN, though not nearly as many selfies. Saeran didn’t understand her need to document everything, but it made her happy, so perhaps it was ok.

            “I’m sorry,” the shelter lady said, “but it’s time to go.” Saeran nodded and carefully scooted away, allowing the woman to step forward and clip a leash to the dog’s collar. As she led him away, Saeran felt a tug of some emotion he couldn’t identify deep in his chest.

            The silent drive back to the bunker felt heavier than the drive to the shelter had. Saeran could feel it, but he couldn’t put a finger on the reason. MC worried her bottom lip between her teeth. They weren’t even halfway home when she changed direction.

            “MC?” Saeran asked. “What are you doing?”

            “Going back to get your dog, if you want him,” she said.

            “What?” Saeran said, not sure if he’d actually heard correctly.

            “We’re going to get your dog,” she repeated. “Don’t look so surprised. I talked to Saeyoung about the possibility long before I even set up this trip. I figured it would be good either way. Cuddling animals is good for your health. Science says so. But there was no way I would put you in a situation where you had to walk away if you didn’t want to. So the decision is yours, whatever you feel most comfortable with.” MC stared at him for a moment, before remember that she was the one driving and should really keep her eyes on the road. Saeran’s mind reeled.

            “But what if I wanted a snake?” he blurted, knowing full well how much MC hated snakes. Saeyoung brought home a rubber snake one time and threw it at MC as a joke. She’d panicked and locked herself in the bedroom for hours. Saeran had made himself a peanut butter and jelly sandwich for supper that night, because he lacked MC’s skills in the kitchen and her conviction that they needed to eat ‘real food’ on a regular basis. Grudgingly, he’d made Saeyoung a sandwich too, as his brother was pressed up against the closed door, furiously apologizing to his fiancée.

            MC took a deep, shuddering breath.

            “If you wanted a snake, that’s what we’d bring home,” she said.  Saeran just stared at her, watching how her hands gripped the steering wheel. It struck him again just how much MC, and Saeyoung, cared about him. Even after more than a year, it still surprised him.

            “I don’t want a snake,” he said, watching MC visibly relax. “But, are you sure? Like, really sure about this?” Saeran fisted his hands in his lap. “I…I still have… bad days… and you and Saeyoung would have to take of me and the dog…” Saeran said guiltily, a tight knot in his chest. MC let go of the wheel with one hand to give his shoulder a quick squeeze, the touch barely there before it was gone again.

            “What would you like to do, Saeran? We’ll always be there to support you,” she said. Saeran took a deep breath.

            “I think,” he said slowly, “that we should go get that dog.” MC whooped. Saeran rolled his eyes. But he smiled, just a little.

           

            An almost incomprehensible whirlwind of activity later and Saeran found himself walking into the bunker with a dog while MC followed with her arms full of supplies. Is this really happening, Saeran wondered. It was a less common question these days, but one that still bothered him on occasion.

            “MC?” he asked, reminding himself that MC and Saeyoung _wanted_ him to ask whenever he wasn’t sure. “MC, is this really happening?” MC paused, shifting the giant bag of dog food in her arms so she could meet his eyes. Once she had eye contact, she said,

            “Yes, Searan, this is really happening.” Saeran nodded. Opening the inner door of the bunker, Saeyoung was waiting for them. He practically vibrated with excitement. Saeran was secretly impressed with how well Saeyoung kept himself under control. Saeyoung immediately rescued MC from the bag of dog food.

            “Defender of Justice, 707, to the rescue!” he declared. “I also made supper,” he announced, sounding incredibly proud of himself. MC gave him a look that was somewhere between terrified and exasperated. Saeyoung was a literal disaster in the kitchen. Saeran wondered if he could go to Yoosung’s for supper. His meals weren’t pretty, but they were edible, which is more than could be said for Saeyoung.

            “If you cooked, why is the bunker still standing,” MC asked. Saeyoung pressed a hand to his chest, almost dropping the dog food in the process.

            “My love, you wound me! Have you no confidence in God Seven?”

            “Not if he’s cooking,” MC said drily. Saeyoung set the dog food down so he could sink dramatically to the floor.

            “Death, death!” he cried before going limp. MC looked at Saeran and rolled her eyes. Stepping over Saeyoung, MC went to assess the situation in the kitchen. He didn’t hear any immediate screaming, so it couldn’t be too bad, Saeran decided. MC reappeared and knelt next to Saeyoung.

            “You ordered take-out!” she announced, pressing a kiss to lips that quirked into a smile, though Saeyoung kept his eyes closed.

            “Up, up!” MC said. “True love’s kiss has healed you, so help me unload the car, oh Defender of Justice!” Saeran moved away from the lovey-dovey couple. They hadn’t talked about it, but Saeran thought his bedroom would be the best place for the dog to stay. It was certainly the cleanest. Searan shut his door and unclipped the leash, allowing the dog to explore.

            “I guess we need a name for you, huh, buddy? I can’t just keep calling you dog.” Saeran watched his new roommate investigate the corners of the room. “What should I call you?” Saeran mused. The dog didn’t respond, obviously, continuing his exploration of the space. Saeran settled cross-legged on his bed and watched. A vague memory pushed its way to the front of his mind, a book Saeyoung snuck home when they were little…he couldn’t remember the name of the book, or the plot, but he remembered enjoying it, remembered that the dog’s name was Scooter.

            “Scooter?” he said out loud. The dog paused and looked at him. “Scooter it is, then.” A muffled thump came from outside his door.

            “That’s probably Saeyoung and MC with the rest of your stuff,” Saeran said. Sliding off the bed, he opened the door. Saeyoung scrambled on the floor, shoving dog toys back into a bag. MC watched him with mild exasperation. Saeran took the bags from her and promptly dropped them on his bed.

            “I’ll deal with that later. I feel like we should give Scooter a chance to explore and settle in on his own. And didn’t someone mention take-out?”

            “Scooter?” Saeyoung repeated, brows furrowed. “Wasn’t there a book…?”

            “Yeah,” Saeran said, blushing slightly. “There was a book. When we were kids.” Saeyoung didn’t push it any farther, and Saeran was glad. They’d made so much progress, but talking about their childhood was still sticky, sometimes. MC grabbed both of them by the arm, linking her elbows through theirs.

            “C’mon! Saeyoung got Indian food!” Saeran let himself be led to the kitchen. Glancing back once, he saw Scooter watching with wary, interested eyes.

 

            Scooter hid a lot those first few weeks. Mostly in Saeran’s room, though he had the run of the bunker. Sometimes he would creep out and lay at Saeran’s end of the couch while they watched movies. Saeran snuck him popcorn when no one was looking. (MC always knew. But she didn’t say anything because she was so proud of Saeran and didn’t want to make him self-conscious.) The first major shift in Scooter’s behavior came surprisingly (or perhaps not) on the first ‘bad day’ Saeran had since bringing Scooter home.

            Saeran knew the signs. The inability to get out of bed was his first clue. The inability to care was the second. _I should try to talk myself out of this,_ Saeran thought. _I should at least try to talk myself out of bed._ But that just seemed like so much _effort._ The weight of it threatened to crush him. _The weight of my emotion is literally pining me to the bed,_ Saeran thought. _That would be morbidly amusing if I could feel anything at all right now._ Scooter whined somewhere in the room. _I should open my eyes and see what he needs,_ Saeran thought. He didn’t open his eyes. Scooter whined again. Saeran heard scratching. Another whine. Then the soft padding of Scooter walking across the room before a wet nose touched his exposed shoulder. Saeran tried to wriggle away but Scooter’s nose followed. Saeran groaned.

            “Do you need to go out?” he asked, somewhat surprised that his voice worked. Scooter barked softly. Saeran groaned again.

            “Are you sure?” Scooter barked again. Saeran pried his eyes open. Scooter stepped back, just the tip of his tail wagging. Saeran dragged himself slowly out of the bed, wincing when his feet hit the ground. He shuffled toward the door, Scooter trotting happily at his side. Saeran crept through the bunker. He hoped desperately that he wouldn’t want to run into Saeyoung or MC. He’d lived with them long enough, they’d be able to tell it was one of his bad days. And they’d worry. They’d worry anyway, but at least they wouldn’t worry yet. Scooter did his business and Saeran shuffled back into the bunker. He curled up on his bed, utterly exhausted from even that little bit of effort. Scooter whined again. Saeran could hear him shifting, as if the dog didn’t know what to do. _Me either, buddy,_ Saeran thought. With a soft _whump_ , the bed dipped as Scooter jumped onto the bed. Scooter was a little unsteady as he stood on the bed, studying Saeran. Scooter had never jumped on the bed before. Scooter stepped gingerly over Saeran. Saeran watched (and lacked the motivation to do anything more than watch.) Scooter draped himself across Saeran’s chest, his head resting on Saeran’s right shoulder, the one with the Mint Eye tattoo. The weight and warmth felt nice. Safe. Calming. The looming sense of despair retreated, just a little, and Saeran drifted back to sleep.

 

            MC and Saeyoung stood in the doorway to Saeran’s room.

            “It’s a bad day,” Saeyoung said despondently. “He’s never miss your waffles if it wasn’t a bad day.” MC didn’t say anything for a while, just rubbed comforting circles between Saeyoung’s shoulder blades.

            “But look at them, Saeyoung. Really look,” she said finally. “Saeran’s accepting comfort. Maybe not from us, not yet, but he’s come so far. And look at the dog who wouldn’t let anyone touch him when we first brought him home. Look at them, Saeyoung. And look at yourself. We’ve all come so far.” She pressed a kiss to Saeyoung’s temple, then another to his lips.

            “This, this is what family really means. Just, being here for each other.”

**Author's Note:**

> Check me out on tumblr @onceandalwaysenglishmajor


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